Ghosts of the Past

I live in a city that is very hot. However, I went to a school that seemed to be oblivious of this fact. It was exceptionally horrible for the female students. I don’t think there was/is one female student there who would have one positive thing to say about our horrid uniform. To think, I spent 6 years in it.

But even with the terrible uniform, life was good back then. Obviously, we didn’t see it at that time. When people would tell us that we had it easy, we didn’t believe them. And now when we tell the high-schoolers that, they don’t believe us. It’s a vicious cycle.

Then you go to university and it’s a whirlwind of an experience. New city, new people, new life. So much potential. But there is also a ton of schoolwork and loneliness. You miss your family. You miss coming home to someone. So you start thinking about when it would be over. And it does get over. And you are thrown into this ‘adult life’ and you wish you could go back to those days.

I think once something becomes part of your past, you only remember the good. You forget the negatives attached to it. The same thing happens when you go through a breakup. You remember the late night conversations, the hand holding, the feeling of love. You forget the fights, the tears, the frustration.

Also, when you are in a relationship, you will have moments where you will think about what it was like being single. The freedom, the fun in doing the chasing and being chased. If you’re happy in your relationship, those moments will pass. Fleeting thought. However, if those thoughts remain, time to be evaluating your happiness in that relationship.

But that happens with anything of the past. Once my hometown became part of my past, I only remembered the beaches, the relaxed life, the sense of belonging. Now that I am back here, I am reminded why I wanted to leave in the first place. Living here also means dealing with an overbearingly traditional community, the slow-paced life.

I think as long as we continue living, we will always remember aspects of our past fondly. Perhaps, life is tough, and remembering the good of the past will bring a temporary smile onto our faces.¬†And that is okay. However, it is also important to not get caught up in these moments. When you start remembering your ex, and all the happy memories, remind yourself of all the shit they put you through. When you start missing your hometown, go spend a few days there, you will get the satisfaction of being there, but you will also remember why you left in the first place, and you’ll soon be making arrangements to leave. If you’re happy, you will not want to go back to your past. If you’re unhappy, maybe it’s time to be making a new future.